i feel guilty for kissing another guy

I remember saying 'no, no, this is bad' in the middle of it, and he said 'I know but I really like you and I have done for ages', and he kissed me again, but this time only for a second because I said ' I really can't do this, I have no excuse, I'm married and he's lovely, it's not like I'm unhappy, he's a good person' then he kinda just stroked my arm and said 'I know, your right, it's just I'm really attracted to you and couldn't not act on it, I'm sorry, you're right'. It how you deal with it that makes the difference. Wouldn't you? Look at your first kiss after divorce as a new beginning, a new chapter. Can you tthan please explain this? Feel free to start your own thread if you finally find you've a need to.). I didnt hear from my piano teacher for at least two weeks after that. SOULMATE: I accept the ASSuming Award. So your crop had already been carrying a blight, hadn't it. reader, missbunbury+, writes (25 October 2005): A Please help. She had gone to bed. "and even though he said he immediately pulled away" My gf went to a house party and got really drunk, and apparently kissed a g My girlfriend got drunk and kissed another guy, 2 months later she got drunk and kissed a girl, HELP. I put a blanket over her and sat back down next to the man. I went that night to a bar and began to get very drunk. Is kissing someone else when drunk cheating? Does she feel guilty over leaving me for another guy? a wiz veteran at Relationship Talk. Pointer much appreciated, though. Alcohol does not change that fact. Not sure how anyone can say they're "certain" he doesn't need to know, given the fact that he made his own standards and expectations perfectly clear on that score, back when he himself was the 'victim' of a come-on. What would people say if she'd slept with someone else? response. Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. I'm not going to let that or any insulting aspersions, subtle or otherwise, put me off. If you. I don't know why I need that so much, but I do. But I do have to state it or I'm failing to do this role properly as well as my innate compulsion to be unwaveringly socially and morally responsible - meaning, if you don't want to respond, don't. Three women and one guy went back. Perhaps this one is geared more toward the ladies, but I feel pretty confident in assuming that no matter the . Despite their passion during the kiss. he said if i started making out with another girl, hed be into it, but if i started getting carried away and disappearing with True mistakes get owned and rectified. Seriously. I recall an incident years ago, we were very young, just teenagers, and a girl planted a big kiss on my hubby (then boyfriend) on a night out. Foxie: There was something missing in my marriage. Which probably makes you wonder why I came here in the first place. It's not that big of a deal anyway and you aren't going to do it again. Should I ask him for gas money? Im a guy and i had sex with my guy bestfriend drunk. If I ws on ur place I would never have told him because he loves me so much and respect me so much and really trust me like anything and if you are guilty and try to relieve ur guilt by telling him still doesn't prove to be beneficial for you and other than that it creates a doubt in his heart that would be very mych lowering The respect he has in his heart for you. If I some how knew which thread to follow to I'd go. Pre-kiss, the straight guys none of whom have ever kissed another man before are asked where society hasanyrules for interaction between heterosexual men. Any help or advise would be much appreciated. 2. Your punishment is living with this. Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Guilt is a common feeling of emotional distress that signals us when our actions or inactions have caused or might cause harm to another personphysical, emotional, or otherwise. Ashley Madison helped things along with extramarital affairs. If you we're my girlfriend and it was years ago and never happened again I would not want to know. Well as far as my experience with sex,I would definitely say I'm not an expert. It's not fair they didn't ask for it. I like the soft smooth touch of a woman and her sexy smell while iam kissing her with passion, if there is a romantic connection it's even better. Oh no worries soulmate, yes we do miss you We'll talk tomorrow. One way to alleviate guilt is by taking action. All of sudden my guy friend stopped texting me good morning and good night Im a guy and i had sex with my guy bestfriend drunk. Loyal Girl sorry to hear about your situation. Just my thoughts having been a victim of cheating. I cannot tell you how much I love my boyfriend and how shocked I am about this. For starters, your husband, even when supposedly immature, didn't kiss HER. LGBTYouTube stars Bria Kam and Chrissy Chambers (BriaAndChrissy) have released a videoexploring what its like for straight guys to kiss other men for the first time. I wish I told my wife, but she found out because in my browsing history I had searched should I tell my wife I kissed a girl when drunk. I felt disorientated. If you were to act like the person you want or see yourself to be, what would you do? You mentioned foreplay as being the main gate. SOULMATE NO URGE :-8 I'm sensing nose in the air LOL You must see The Grand Canyon, New York- Theater/Art so much raw talent, Before you close I'd like to say that I totally agree with you. I went to a party with friends last night and I kissed someone.. Hang on because I'm sure there will be other people who believe differently from me. I'm not condoning what I've done, and it's a totally different set of circumstances, but I remember wishing I had never known about the stupid kiss, as it tainted things for a while afterward. Try to let it go and forgive yourself. I myself have had issues in the past months but I won't elaborate. A relationship with a man is supposed to be specifically platonic, says YouTuber David Godinez, while filmmaker James Rath says that men are told not to be physically intimate. Where were you hiding it - up your sleeve? And I know himhad it made him feel the slightest bit threatened and worried, either he'd have said so there and then, or, if for some reason hadn't felt capable, would have shown in his behaviour at some point (I was watching for it regardless). Kissing someone other than your spouse is cheating. Arun, I agree with everything you said here because I was guilty of kissing a guy I liked when I was drunk, knowing that I liked him and wanted to see how much.". Forget about it! My eyes were closed and my head was spinning. I regret waiting so long to tell him.-2 months. He has morals. Don't have an account? Guilt occurs primarily in interpersonal contexts and is considered a "pro-social" emotion because it helps you maintain good relations with others. It's good that you're willing to forgive,most women would divorce. Press J to jump to the feed. Later, I spoke to my fianc and he told me he loved me and was sorry. If your husband *did* get wind of it thus realised you'd kept it secret from him - despite he told YOU when someone made a pass at HIM - he'd then have A NUMBER of major beefs with you: If you drink so much that you lose track of everything, then you already took the first step on a dangerous road. It sounds simple, but if you think you know how to apologize effectively, you are likely wrong. i think OP is using 'kiss' to mean 'more than kiss', but whatever, it was 4 years ago in a rough patch.. everyone here is wrong. Or run away? Please leave me a comment. Soulmate I guess as long as you stay at this site I'll find all of you. You're denying him that right and being selfish. That is what separates the women from the girls. You just never, ever know. I'm sure you'll survive if you don't tell him and I'm certain that he doesn't need to know. But there's a psychological ingredient missing as naturally affects the optimum biological conditions Confide in someone you trust. | "then the cheeky ugger only went and bloody kissed me, didn't he! I was surprised by his reaction, but I shook my head and said it was nothing like that. This guy wouldnt take money from me (I should have seen this as a Red Flag, but didnt), so I bought him opera scores in order to compensate him for his time and expertise. I mean that in a funny way. And the tricky piece de resistance In that sort of scenario, where the kiss (or any intimate contact) lingers for more than half a second - or, put more simply, isn't the kind you'd feel comfortable giving/receiving from your own parent or grandparent - it's an opening of the door, whether or not you subsequently recover your senses and slam it shut again. I have to admit that by kissing this guy whom I liked, I did cheat on my husband. :-). And, of course, cheating always tends to increase during a recession. I dont want him to be thinking that I am a cheat. They say don't tell the wife or husband about the infidelity, because it would cause more hurt. reader, anonymous, writes (21 March 2006): A Even despite it included you having to become whatever degree of a low-down doity adulterer. reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2005): Already have an account? It's quick, easy, free and you don't have to leave your real name. SOULMATE is totally right and we all know it. My SO and I had been dating two years. My libido is sharper when Im sober, at least if Im really attracted to a guy and have the love goggles on. That's a lot to take in. If you feel like this about yourself then you may be worrying about what he will do while he's at university. stop any contact (outside of work) immediately. drunk, kissing. Y'know what it all boils down to the lips. Being drunk is never a "reason" for cheating. It's one of those cases where keeping it a secret would be worse than the transgression itself, especially since it'd be a case of 'the pot calling the kettle black'. If, on the other hand, you kissed someone whom you knew or someone your significant other believes youve always liked, and then you confess that you kissed him or her, your actions could have major consequences for your relationship Why? Knowing what you value will help you build the most meaningful life possible. As for what we believe about kissing being the gateway to sex (specifically foreplay, which itself is the main gate): if anyone believes it *isn't*, thenwellAll I could say to that is: Add your answer to this question! I am NOT looking forward to spotting him in the corridor at workHOW EMBARRASSING!. I wasn't there but news travelled fast and I knew about it through friends by the next morning. Bad things happen.Yes.but wat i d recomnd u is NEVER EVER tell him ! Personally I don't believe in marriage. I think a real man actually kisses a dude at least once to really know your sexuality, one says. Scopes: okay, although the whole point of forums is [1] that they're anonymous and [2] people's problems aren't ever remotely unique enough for the poster not to potentially be literally from anywhere in the world thus unidentifiable. (No, I'm very passionate about fidelity.) So, I reluctantly confessed to getting drunk and kissing my piano teacher. You'll have to accept it, face up to it, and put it behind you. Not just what I did but the fact I work with this person and have to continue to work with him. And I have never cheated myself. I'm dating this guy and have been for about 2 months. I felt sick! get into counselling. As one young man said " time heals" and he's so right. Why? I know it was wrong and I regret it all. Oh, I'm sure he'd be able to forgive her, LOYAL GIRL. And Brodie groped James. Then I ordered taxis, woke up the other girl and we left. Drop it in CASUALLY, as part of general chit-chat, like it's no big thing (because if it's no biggie to you then that must mean it isn't and wasn't any threat to him), and in such a way as draws similarities with his own past incident. I worry I made huge mistakes in my life and that I am destined to life a "good" family life forever more, but never feel that amazing desire and lust and sexual attraction I don't feel for anyone else but this man. She emailed him out of the Blue, and he proudly showed me both her smarmy email and his polite yet nonetheless "on yer bike!" [3] you couldn't extend to him the same courtesy he'd already extended to *you* (i.e. Lol Spoiler alert: Not that different from kissing a girl, only they dont fancy them. I said to my husband, I have something to tell you, but I dont know how to say it.. Dont tell me that you and ______ (the girl who was staying at our house for the weekend) are lesbians? I spent the next day in bed all day crying and it has to be one of the saddest days of my life. Hey all. We were not drunk. We were chatting when we realised the other woman was snoring. It's South of France for us this year, holiday-wise, and then in about a year-and-a-half's time we're off permanently to Espana (por favor). Mr S lived there once (San Fransisco), but he hasn't any urge to return, either. However, if you kissed someone whom you liked or had a crush on while you were drunk, my opinion is that you cheated. Kissed someone on vakation while drunk, cheating or not? The 5 Ingredients of an Effective Apology, The Power of a Dream: The Customs Inspector, 3 High-Risk Relationship Concerns No Couple Should Ignore, Eliminating Guilt, Shame, Regret, and Worry, Protecting the Innocent: The Cognitive Context of Guilt, How to Deal with Breakup Guilt in a Healthy Way. This was a relationship BTW not a marriage. It's not the crime that counts, it's the time. Stories about open relationships, swinging, polyamory and other alternative relationship structures. You can't fake that . My husband wasnt home at the time. Again - your choice. i agree with everyone there's some really good sharing here. How Psychologically Conditioned Rats Are Defusing Landmines, The Innate Intelligence Observed in the Dying Process. Make it up to him by being an awesome girlfriend. My husband always encouraged me to pursue music, and, when I told him that this guy wanted to give me advanced piano lessons, my husband was in favor of this. What!! "what the hell where we at?" If he is like me, its a choice. I had had an argument with my fianc because I found a suspicious text from a woman , he became very mad . But now he has begun university and I trust him with everything but I keep thinking of what I did. 2. ;-). Good luck. Please help me. Houston, well, whaddayaknow - I'M PREGNANT! It is the gateway to another feeling. Not work you put off until 'tomorrow' - TODAY. So, you went to a party and everyone was drinking. Yes it hurts.. Because just as everyone else is saying, if you did the RIGHT thing, you shouldn't feel guilty. I was devastated. Wow, you really do want a baby, don't you. If you want a relationship then be ready to be trustworthy. I'd never be able to get over it. As far as crossed purposes,hmmmmmmmm not following you. Because your significant other doesnt fully believe that you just kissed this person because you were intoxicated. When you're in a long-term relationship, it's normal to have a little crush on someone other than your partner. New Mexico sunsets flat lands breathtaking. It's wonderful that you even wanted to kiss someone! You don't have control over these things. . like, by not investing his heart too much via (wait for it) an optimum amount of kisses and cuddles, etc? View related questions: Kissing a man, I've just got into over the past couple years. I am a good person and have never done anything like this before. It's just a "good weekend?" On which note - "Marriage is about trust not tryst": I like that saying. I kissed another man four years ago. Buster was in law school Buster Murdaugh, left, and his girlfriend Brooklynn White watch a video clip from Buster's brother Paul's phone in the double murder trial of Alex Murdaugh at the Colleton . Oh my god, (Brodie)bit my tongue! yells James. You went and MARRIED someone who was your best FRIEND, not your Bam!, Pow!, "oh my god there is a god!" I kissed another guy while drunk. I calmly told him that I wasnt in love with him, but I did feel some attraction and that I accepted the liquor and the kiss because I was curious to find out if there was anything between us. The next time you saw your significant other you might have blurted out, I have a confession to make. male See "The 5 Ingredients of an Effective Apology"; you probably miss at least two of them when you apologize. "but the fact I work with this person and have to continue to work with him. " At least I understood why our marriage failed and no further closure was needed. I could go on about a lot of things here. Whoops. Even so, you might find that you are still attracted to other people. As I left, the boy who I kissed came with me and I tried my best to shrug him off. If he forgave you, then it sounds like he accepted that it was a mistake, that you won't do it again and has moved on. Thank you. After all, if you're still berating yourself for what you did, it won't matter whether or not your partner has totally forgiven you. Youre not homosexual until youre actually attracted to dudes., MORE : Bella Thorne reveals she is bisexual by kissing a girl in surprise Snapchat, MORE : These are the UKs most powerful LGBT people, Doctor explains why some men faint or get nosebleeds when they get an erection, This is the number of sexual partners the average Brit has had, Mum in coven manifests orgasms and schedules sex magick with husband, Post-pill clarity: I came off contraception and didnt fancy my partner anymore, How I Do It: Its empowering to have a guy over and pleasure myself afterwards, follow-up video of straight girls kissing other girls for the first time, Bella Thorne reveals she is bisexual by kissing a girl in surprise Snapchat, These are the UKs most powerful LGBT people, Do not sell or share my personal information. What you *can* have is the Biggest B*lls on the Block award. But living a lie would be so much worse. Again I could go on with this subject,and I undoubtedly will. I could tell that he had a thing for you. We started kissing again and he took my T shirt off and I briefly started kissing his body. I believe that over time this would have happened with or without the wiskey. Maybe she was experimenting or it was something shed thought about and wanted to see what it felt like. At least I'll know I've done my bit to the very best of my capability. (That'll do me nicely! I'm so confused. I think your just another female using your man until a better option comes along your husband should dump you because one of these days your going dump him if he doesnt. So if your planting includes a blight (guilty secret), please don't moan if it affects the crop yield. If this is bothering you, then tell him. I agree. By clicking 'Submit' or otherwise submitting this form you agree to the, By entering this site you declare He never says this so I knew it was something serious. NO don't actually make it easy for him to have ANY KIND OF RELATIONSHIP with this woman!!!!